Now for something weird. It’s a new Claytoonz animation. Cognitive Dreams!!!

Because of the coronavirus, fans haven’t been allowed into professional sports. But, the leagues are attempting to recreate a live atmosphere for their games.

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The NBA is actually piping fans in. That is, they’re on screens watching the game in real-time so there are actual genuine reactions to what’s happening.

World Wrestling Entertainment company was the first “sport” to return because after giving Republicans a shit ton of money, Florida’s governor declared wrestling an “essential” service. Apparently in Florida, it’s essential to see people get clobbered in their heads with chairs and thrown through tables. But, they have actual fans in attendance. Granted, they’re trainees so technically, these “fans” are being paid to be there. So, I guess that kinda makes them virtual fans.

Also, soccer, hockey, and NASCAR are playing again (does NASCAR “play?”) but I haven’t watched any of those yet and when I do, it’ll just be hockey.

It seems Donald Trump might want to take a cue from professional sports.

The Trump Campaign boasted about the million people ordering tickets to his Tulsa rally. The venue could seat about 19,000 people but only 6,000 showed up and it killed Trump’s black friend Herman Cain. It was a sad day. Also, it got his Campaign Manager and grifter Brad Parscale fired. On top of all that, Trump is now planning to ban TikTok because K-pop fans used the app to organize fake ticket requests (also, there’s a brilliant comedian, Sarah Cooper, doing lip-sync impersonations of Trump that’s really pissing him off).

Over the weekend, when Donald Trump wasn’t golfing, he went to Florida for a fundraiser and ended up holding a mini Trump rally on the tarmac after getting off the plane. Donald Trump ranted his usual set, playing all the hits, to a…did I say “mini Trump rally? Yeah, he played all the hits to a very sparse crowd doing their best not to wear face masks in order to catch the coronavirus for Donald Trump. I’m using the word “sparse” generously here.

How “sparse” was it? It was so sparse, the White House released a photo of it where…wait for it…they photo-shopped in more people. Actually, it wasn’t more people. It was the same people. They took the crowd and multiplied it. So, if you look at the photo carefully, you see the same racist assholes several times. It’s kinda like when Fox News shows a photo of Jeffrey Epstein, they crop out Donald Trump. Seriously.

Altering pictures of Donald Trump isn’t new to this White House, In the past, they’ve doctored photos to make Donald Trump appear thinner and stand up straight. They’ve even added crowds to his crowds, usually by taking crowds from much more popular events, like Antique Road Show (I made that up, sort of). It’s kinda like whenever Melania delivers a speech, she has to steal it from Michelle Obama, who by the way, is probably going to be missing some roses from her rose garden very soon.

I expect the Republicans to pipe people into their convention later this month. Holy crap! That’s this month? But anyway, maybe they’ll do it like the NBA and display screens of fans in real-time. I mean, sure it won’t be as diverse as an NBA audience but it could be Trump’s best opportunity to actually feature black people in his crowd…you know…that they’re not going to kill later. And maybe they can actually feature someone wearing a “Blacks for Trump” shirt who is actually a black person.

Donald Trump always boasted that large attendance at his rallies proves how popular he is. So using his logic, or what little of it there actually is, what do small crowds say about his support? I mean, if you can’t even get the racist assholes to come out in Florida, you’re might be kinda doomed. Maybe they were all watching wrestling.

I miss fans at actual sports (not wrestling or NASCAR). They’re a part of the game. But I’m not going to miss seeing thousands of racist Republicans on my TV. Or at least, they won’t be in the same room as the event. I’m looking forward to the dead air hurting Donald Trump’s tiny feeble feelings. The true irony is that Donald Trump’s fans are fake anyway. They’re fake patriots. They’re fake Christians. Hell, they’re fake Americans.

And maybe after November, we won’t have to deal with a fake president anymore.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Here’s your cartoon for this week’s CNN Opinion newsletter. Please sign up to get these in your inbox every Sunday.

The funniest thing about this cartoon is that a few people who left comments about it on social media took it seriously. They were like, “No, we can’t trust her. She’s a Trump.” and, “I would prefer so and so blah blah blah.”

People. It’s a cartoon. I’m not advocating for Joe Biden to pick Mary Trump. In fact, she’s not even a candidate among his prospects.

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OK, who do you want to see Joe pick?

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Time to check out some roughs.

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But it was worth it. I was very happy with the way it turned out and it got crazy shares on social media.

I’m glad I did not draw this cartoon because every political cartoonist in the country has drawn a covid baseball by now. Stop it, guys. Just stop it. Hmmmm….maybe I’ll do a covid hockey puck. NO NO NO!!!!

Speaking of lame ideas. I was getting desperate when I threw this one out. It’s such an awful and worn out cliche. The only person who can bring any justice to these kind of cliches is usually Tom Toles. In fact, he did do a sinking ship last week and it was brilliant.

I was trying to show the disparity between the eloquence, brilliance, and class of Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and whatever it is that’s wrong with Donald Trump.

This was my first suburbs idea. I kinda liked it but was a little daunted with how it’d work out artistically. It’s also based on that fear-mongering Trump campaign commercial. More about that in a minute.

Yeah, no, but dogs know more words than Donald Trump.

I liked my cowboys. I still may do something with this concept. Republicans are such hypocrites without any principles. Donald Trump could start blowing chemtrails out his ass and they’d all be like, “yay, ass chemtrails!”.

I didn’t draw this one because I figured someone else would too. I haven’t seen it yet. Yet.

I was trying to do something here with an empty convention and it wasn’t working.

Do you know that commercial from the Trump Campaign where someone’s trying to call the police but there aren’t any because they’ve been defunded and it’s showing violent scenes and warning that’ll be Joe Biden’s America, yet all the footage is from Trump’s America? This cartoon is based on that. Next, they’ll say Joe Biden’s America will kill over 150,000 Americans with a virus.

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As you see, I started to draw this cartoon. The entire thing was going to be one huge crowd scene. Yes, Waldo would have been included. In the middle of it, I stopped and did something else. I’m glad too. By the way, I threw an alien in there for shits and giggles and that was before the Demon Sperm Alien DNA lady came out.

I was going to draw this one but change the guy to a mom in a yellow shirt. I may bring it back depending on how things develop.

Are any of these good? Should I have made an official cartoon out of any of them? If so, tell me which ones.

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New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

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Last night, South Carolina Representative James Clyburn told Chris Cuomo on CNN that he couldn’t determine if Donald Trump hates people who look like him, but he knows Donald Trump doesn’t respect people who look like him. As Clyburn explained, you can hate someone you perceive is above you or on your level, but you disrespect those you deem beneath you.

Clyburn’s theory is a good one because Donald Trump has demonstrated he only respects himself and people like Vladimir Putin. In fact, he’s deathly afraid of Vladimir Putin. But the disrespect theory lines up with explaining why Trump hires black people and at least pretends one or two of them are his friends. When someone like Herman Cain puts his life on the line to cater to Donald Trump’s politicization of the coronavirus, that’s not something to respect. People don’t respect people who kiss their ass, even if it kills the asskissers.

The black friend defense for Donald Trump, and pointing out he put Ben Carson in his cabinet, fizzles when you point out Strom Thurmond slept with back women. Hiring Ben Carson doesn’t mean Donald Trump respects him. Donald Trump could be fucking Ben Carson and still not have any respect for him.

But if Donald Trump doesn’t hate black people (get that Trump/Carson image out of your head), he definitely disrespects them and is using racism as a wedge issue to cater to his racist base. As some have pointed out, he doesn’t care about the Confederate flag, monuments, or bases named after treasonous generals who fought against the United States to preserve slavery. For Trump, it’s just a tool. Why would a New Yorker care about Confederate statues? Even Queens resident Archie Bunker, who flipped out over the Jeffersons living next door before they moved on up, probably didn’t care about Confederate statues.

Last Wednesday, Donald Trump made an appeal to suburban voters, a group he’s losing. In doing so, he made a racist pitch in a tweet. Donald Trump tweeted, “I am happy to inform all of the people living their Suburban Lifestyle Dream that you will no longer be bothered or financially hurt by having low income housing built in your neighborhood…” He continued it into a second tweet, “…Your housing prices will go up based on the market, and crime will go down. I have rescinded the Obama-Biden AFFH Rule. Enjoy!”

Donald Trump is trying to save the suburban housewives of America by telling them to “enjoy” the lack of diversity in their neighborhoods. To “enjoy” their home prices not falling because of black people moving in. The thing is, they’ve already moved in. When you knock on that door, there’s no guarantee a white person will answer it. Donald Trump will be like the 安卓影梭吧-百度贴吧:2021年2月7日 - shadowsock安卓版4.3 shadowrocket安卓版 shadowsock官网下载 shadowsock安卓版设置 安卓翻墙用什么软件好 shadowsock 安卓4.7 shadowsock安卓配置 sh....

Suburbia was the refuge for white Americans fleeing cities and integration. Why, there won’t be any black kids at your kid’s school if there aren’t any black kids in the school district (Oops. There was bussing). But today, the suburbs aren’t just white anymore. They’re also not just middle and upper income. Poverty has also hit the suburbs.

Donald Trump is out of touch with the suburbs if he envisions them the way his father did. The suburbs are no longer strictly white. They can’t be stereotyped like Leave it to Beaver. In fact, June Cleaver speaks Jive.

It’s understandable Donald Trump is out of touch with the suburbs because he’s probably never been to one. But he is in touch with trying to keep property values up by using his racism. Back when he was a private citizen doing his small part to destroy the country, before he became president (sic) and started doing his large part to destroy the country, Donald Trump was sued by the Justice Department for discriminating by refusing to rent to black tenants. The Justice Department sued him…twice.

Donald Trump is a racist. He’s telling white America he’ll keep the black people from moving in next door, or as he likes to say it, “the blacks.” But being an official white guy, I hear more complaints about assholes living next door than I do about anyone’s race. I can also tell you from personal experience, the best neighborhoods I’ve lived in have been diverse. America is now a place where it’s not just the neighborhoods that are diverse, but families are too.  Why would I worry about blacks and Latino people living next door when I have black and Latino people in my family? My nightmare would be living next to someone who flies a Trump flag. Ew. You know they don’t recycle.

It’s the emerging diversity of this nation that scares Donald Trump and his base. They believe their white privilege is in danger and as more rights are extended to people who don’t look like them, somehow it threatens their rights. Maybe it just threatens our privilege (yes, I have it too). What’s scares them and can’t be stopped now is in the future, white will no longer be the majority. We’re already at the point the only way whites control Congress is by gerrymandering and voter suppression. The only way someone racist like Trump can be elected president is through the racist antiquated electoral college.

Leave it to Beaver is not the representation of the neighborhoods of Donald Trump’s supporters. No, it’s the St. Louis couple on their lawn with automatic weapons because black people are walking by their house. It’s their defense of being in danger because pedestrians were black. That’s Donald Trump’s America.

In 2016, America showed us it’s a lot more racist than we believed. It was enlightening and frightening. Hopefully, 2023 will show us it’s not as racist. Donald Trump is betting all his racist cards that it is.

That’s because Donald Trump is a racist and the last thing I want is to live in a neighborhood full of Trump supporters. That’ll drive the property values down and really keep the good people out.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

After finishing yesterday’s cartoon, I treated myself to a McDonald’s breakfast. As I was walking back into my apartment, I saw breaking news on CNN about Herman Cain. I was hoping the “breaking news” was that he was being released from the hospital after acquiring coronavirus. I am sad it wasn’t. I don’t wish bad health or death upon anyone, no matter their politics.

Yesterday afternoon, I saw a post from a conservative cartoonist complaining about the media “implying” Herman Cain caught the coronavirus at Donald Trump’s Tulsa rally. How dare that dastardly media for reporting the facts. That same conservative was upset President Obama “politicized” John Lewis’ death by talking about the issue John Lewis dedicated his life to, voting rights, but ignored that Donald Trump used Herman Cain’s death to hurl another racial slur about the “China” virus.

Perhaps if we had better contract tracing, we would have a better understanding of where Cain caught the virus, but as the facts stand, the Tulsa rally is a pretty good culprit. Cain was hospitalized less than two weeks after attending Trump’s campaign rally in Tulsa.

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Before the rally, Donald Trump played down wearing masks and social distancing. Neither was mandated at the rally in a state where the virus was surging. The campaign removed social distancing stickers from seats. They discouraged any safety measures being taken at the rally. Yet, they still required all attendees to sign a waiver absolving the Trump Campaign of any liability in the case of them catching the coronavirus. During this pandemic, Donald Trump said he took no responsibility for any of the government’s failures. And if you catch the virus while going out of your way to praise him, he won’t accept any responsibility for that either.

Herman Cain was excited to attend the rally. He tweeted that not wearing a mask to the rally was freedom. During the rally, he tweeted a photo of him with several “Black Voices for Trump” and “Having a fantastic time.” Nobody was wearing a mask in the photo. Shortly before entering the hospital, he tweeted about Donald Trump’s July 4th South Dakota rally and that people were “fed up” with having to wear face masks. He was cheering over face masks not being mandated at that particular rally. But which is a greater inconvenience, wearing a face mask or being dead? Well, we can’t ask him.

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When it comes to the virus, Republicans are slow learners. Even while having the virus, Herman Cain continued to politicize it. He politicized it all the way to his grave. Politicizing it is what put him in there. Are Republicans learning from this?

Congressman Louis Gohmert has spent months politicizing the virus and being an anti-mask wearer. After contracting the coronavirus, he informed his staff in person while…wait for it…not wearing a mask. So, no. Republicans are NOT learning from this. Later, Louis said he probably caught the virus from the facemasks he hardly ever wore. Now, bald-headed mask-hating Louis is going to fight the virus with…wait for it again…hydroxychloroquine. Gohmert is risking his life to cater to Donald Trump’s ego. Herman Cain lost his life kissing Donald Trump’s ass. Republicans are slow learners. You don’t want to die with your lips fully planted on Trump’s ass.

And the thing about Louis Gohmert being tested is that he wasn’t tested for his health. He was tested to protect Donald Trump as was required before boarding a plane with him.

Herman Cain’s death was tragic and it could have been prevented. The Tulsa rally could have been postponed, canceled, or never planned in the first place during a pandemic. Donald Trump was selfish for his cult’s worship during a pandemic. Unfortunately, his friend’s wellbeing, like that of the rest of this nation’s, was not important to Donald Trump.

If nothing else, we could be learning from Herman Cain’s death, or using it to at least educate Republicans. But with Trump still attending fundraisers maskless and people like Louis Gohmert continuing to cling to political conspiracy theories instead of science, Herman’s life was truly wasted.

For my conservative “pal” upset the media is “implying” Herman Cain caught the virus at Donald Trump’s Tulsa rally, sorry. All evidence points at the Tulsa rally. And instead of calling it the “China Virus,” call it the “Trump Virus” because the Trump Virus killed Herman Cain. It was wasted in the name of Trumpism. It was the cost of being in the Trump cult.

Donald Trump killed Herman Cain. His greed, selfishness, and sheer stupidity killed Him. Herman could have saved his own life by never joining the Trump cult. Donald Trump kills people. Donald Trump is a cancer. Donald Trump is poison.

But Herman isn’t the only one. So far, the Trump Virus has killed over 152,000 Americans. What’s our national plan for fighting it? We still don’t have one and Donald Trump now wants to risk your children’s lives for his own self-interest. At this point, it’s definitely the Trump Virus. Since Donald Trump doesn’t want to do anything to combat the virus and save Americans from it, the only cure is to vote him out of office.

During the 2016 campaign, Donald Trump asked black Americans, “What do you have to lose?”. Today, ask all Americans that question. Herman Cain has your answer.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

The thing that annoys me most about Republicans who have joined the Trump cult is they don’t have principles. They’re all about reduced government spending until Donald Trump runs up the national debt. They’re all about patriotism until Donald Trump insults veterans and allows Putin to place bounties on soldiers’ lives. They used to be about family values until Mr. five-kids-with-three-wives-pussy-grabber came along. They can’t find a principled position to take a stand on. Today, the sycophantic Qanon conspiracy theorists for Trump warns us all about the deep state lizard people, but if Donald Trump appointed a few lizard people to his administration, they’d all be like, “Thank you, President (sic) Trump, for the lizard people.”

And who says Donald Trump hasn’t appointed lizard people? They were all about draining the swamp but didn’t protest against him appointing campaign contributors to ambassadorships. They didn’t protest his cabinet members gifting themselves at our expense. They don’t protest Trump enriching himself on our dime. They don’t protest foreign diplomats staying at Trump hotels. They don’t protest Trump charging the Secret Service for golf cart rentals. Hell, they were even against a president playing golf until Donald Trump spent over $300 million of our money on his golf trips.

Maybe Donald Trump’s deep state lizard person is Attorney General William Barr. Trump sycophants worry about fictional corruption, like Hillary Clinton personally selling our uranium supply to Russia, but they ignore the Attorney General being Donald Trump’s personal goon who has transformed the Justice Department into the Donald Trump Personal Protection and Racketeering Agency.

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William Barr used the Donald Trump talking point that cops kill more white people than black people. There are more white people in the nation than black people. Statistically, cops kill more blacks. William Barr went to college. He has a law degree. He’s smart enough to know the talking point he crapped out of his mouth was pure and total grade-A racist bullshit.

Barr claimed President Obama spied on Donald Trump’s 2016 presidential campaign. No, Obama did not. The FBI tracked a couple of suspected Russian spies who worked for the Trump campaign. That is not spying. If tracking on suspected Russian spies was spying on the Trump campaign, then what does that make the Trump campaign? It’s hard to say you’re not Trump’s personal attorney when your Justice Department, like Donald Trump, is more concerned about the well being of Russian spies than about the people investigating said spies.

William Barr repeated Donald Trump’s accusation that President Obama didn’t restock the nation’s stockpile of PPE, ignoring the fact Donald Trump has been president for over three years. After spending three years staring at your own empty closet, you can’t blame its emptiness on the guy who owned it before you. Again, it’s been three years. Are the salt shakers empty in the White House cafeteria? Are you going to blame Obama for that?

William Barr carried out Trump’s talking point that all Black Lives Matter protesters are violent which is why unidentified secret police are needed to invade American cities and teargas and hit Vietnam veterans and mothers over the heads with billy clubs.

William Barr repeated Trump’s claim he had “no responsibility” for testing failures which extend to Trump having no fault for the lack of any national plan to confront the virus or any blame for the death of over 150,000 Americans.

William Barr carried on the Trump talking point that mail-in voting was ripe for voter fraud…despite the fact he and Trump have both voted through that method.

Barr claimed the clearing of protesters with tear gas and goons on horses in front of the White House and Trump’s visit minutes later through the clearing to visit St. John’s church on June 1 were totally unrelated.

Finally, William Barr said “Antifa” about 98 times during the hearing. Here’s a fact for you: There is no such organization called “Antifa.”

Quite frankly, I’m shocked William Barr didn’t make a pitch to host the G7 at Doral and the British Open at Trump Turdberry.

William Barr can’t defend himself.  The only legal cases he’s personally interjected himself into are those that concern Donald Trump’s goons.

He’s fired U.S. Attorneys investigating Donald Trump’s friends. He overruled his own department’s prosecutors and has asked a court to drop all charges against Michael Flynn (who’s probably a Russian spy). He recommended a sentence reduction for Trump goon Roger Stone before Donald Trump commuted his sentence.

During the hearing, Representative Eric Swalwell reminded Barr that during his confirmation, he said it would be a crime for a president to issue a pardon in exchange for the recipient’s promise to not incriminate him. When asked why he wasn’t investigating Donald Trump for issuing a commutation of his personal goon Roger Stone’s prison sentence, which was granted after Stone didn’t turn on Trump and even bragged that he lied to protect Donald Trump, William fucking Barr said, “Why should I?”. Because you’re the fucking Attorney General, asshole, and Roger Stone told you explicitly he broke the law to protect Donald Trump who then saved him from going to prison.

It was pointed out Barr has never personally intervened in a case involving someone who’s not a Trump goon. He’s never sought to throw out a sentence or have one reduced for anyone who’s not a GOT, Goon of Trump’s. He also pleaded ignorance to knowing any details about why Michael Cohen was sent back to prison for refusing to agree not to talk to the media or write a book on Donald Trump.

William Barr is a Trump goon. He also denied systemic racism exists in America’s police departments. How about the Justice Department? Representative Cedric Richmond pointed out that when Barr came to the hearing, he brought his top staff which didn’t include any black people. Richmond pointed out that’s systemic racism. At the start of the hearing, Barr paid his respects to civil rights icon John Lewis. Richmond told Barr, “You really should keep the name of the Honorable John Lewis out of the Department of Justice’s mouth.” Later, Senator Kamala Harris said, “Bill Barr hasn’t lifted a finger as Attorney General to protect voting rights in America. He has no business speaking John Lewis’s name.”

Even when he was asked if it would be “appropriate for a president to solicit assistance” from a foreign government during an election,” Barr said, “It depends on what kind of assistance” before backtracking and saying no. You know what kind of assistance. The illegal kind. That’s the only kind of foreign assistance to a presidential campaign. I’m not even a lawyer and I know that. Another thing I know that the Attorney General of the United Freaking States doesn’t is that a president canNOT move an election date.

It’s hard to declare your independence from Donald Trump when you repeat Donald Trump’s lying talking points and act as his fat human shield. William Barr is a liar and a Trump goon. He’s as corrupt as Donald Trump.

Quite frankly, we’d be safer with the lizard people.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Yesterday, during his bogus coronavirus hearings that are actually replacements for his hater rallies, Donald Trump wondered out loud why Dr. Anthony Fauci is more popular than he is. For his answer, maybe he should consult with Dr. Demon Sperm.

Donald Trump pointed out they’re a part of the same team and administration, yet Fauci has better ratings. For starters, they’re a part of the same team but Donald Trump didn’t hire Dr. Fauci. Ronald Reagan did. And despite being part of the same team, Donald Trump has engaged and engineered a smear campaign against the good doctor. As to why their approvals are in different places, Fauci has been honest and direct with Americans. In contrast, Donald Trump ignored the virus, downplayed it, politicized it, and spread lies while it has killed nearly 150,000 Americans and ruined the economy. And finally, a great reason Donald Trump’s numbers are so low when it comes to handling the virus, he’s ignored the very accomplished doctor on his team and has relied on the junk science of conspiracy theorists and loons who are seriously fucked in the head. Yes, that’s a medical term for this blog, “seriously fucked in the head.”

After seeing Donald Trump’s choice for his personal physician, nobody anywhere ever ever ever should listen to him ramble incoherently about anything that has to do with health and medicine (or anything else for that matter). The man actually believes human bodies are like batteries, with energy that doesn’t replenish, and we waste it on exercise. And now, he’s telling Americans to follow the medical advice from Dr. Demon Sperm. What?

Donald Trump retweeted a video of Dr. Stella Immanuel, a Houston doctor from Nigeria who was part of the “White Coat Summit,” a gathering of a few doctors who call themselves America’s Frontline Doctors and dispute the medical consensus on the coronavirus. She and the other doctors gave testimonials on the steps of the Supreme Court in an event organized by the group Tea Party Patriots, funded by wealthy right-wing assholes.

A video of the event went viral as the doctor pushed the drug hydroxychloroquine and claimed people don’t need to wear face masks and that a cure for the coronavirus has been found.

“Nobody needs to get sick,” Immanuel said. “This virus has a cure.” Then she said, “Hello, you don’t need a mask. There is a cure.” Hello? Are you seriously fucked in the head? Yes. Yes, she is.

The video, captured by Breitbart, gained over 13 million views and was shared by Donald Trump and his idiot son number 1, Donald Trump Jr. Later, the video was removed from YouTube and Twitter for pushing junk science. A conservative political cartoonist I know shared the video while declaring them “real doctors,” only to discover it was removed and replaced with a tag saying, “False information.”

Despite being pushed by the Trumps, the conservative student group of idiots, Turning Point, and those pro-Trump medical luminaries (that’s sarcasm) Diamond & Silk, hydroxychloroquine doesn’t help fight the coronavirus. Studies have failed to find proof the drug has any benefit in treating the virus and the Food and Drug Administration revoked its emergency authorization to use it to treat it, saying it hadn’t demonstrated any effect on patients’ mortality prospects.

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She also claims she’s cured over 300 people of the coronavirus without providing any proof…and wait…let’s go back to this demon booty stuff.

Dr. Immanuel has posted videos on YouTube of her sermons where she claims medical issues like endometriosis, cysts, infertility, and impotence are caused by sex with “spirit husbands” and “spirit wives” by having sex with them in your dreams.

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Now that she’s found the source of impotence, congressional Republicans will push to fund a study on how to purge our nation of these buzz-killing sex demons.

The doctor also claims ailments other than those in the hoo-ha stem from “demonic sperm,” such as financial ruin. It may also lead to one having her license to practice medicine taken away. Demonic sperm is like sand. It gets everywhere.

When asked yesterday about the doctor and her “medical” theories, Donald Trump said she was very “impressive” and “spectacular.” And then that “maybe” the doctor pushing those theories was her or it wasn’t. Then he ran from the room as the next question was being asked.

Donald, it was she. There’s no maybe about it. The real scientific phenomenon here is that we can’t convince 60 million people not to vote for the guy endorsing Dr. Demon Sperm.

The videos were removed from most social media, and Twitter even temporarily suspended Donald Trump Jr’s account. Removing the videos pissed Dr. Stella Immanuel off.

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The last I checked, Jesus has not shut down Facebook. neither have the witches, lizard people, or the demon sperm.

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New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

shadow

When asked if he would visit the United States Capitol to pay his respects to John Lewis, Donald Trump said no. But, an invite to visit Mr. Lewis’ body lying in state in the Capitol rotunda is probably like that invite from the Yankees. It didn’t happen.

Instead of visiting the Capitol and paying his respects to the late congressman and civil rights leader, who had his skull cracked while protesting on the Edmund Pettus Bridge on Bloody Sunday, 1965, Donald Trump chose to stage a photo-op in North Carolina where he continued his lies about the coronavirus pandemic.

The thing is, kids, it’s hard to pay your respects when you don’t have any. Donald Trump doesn’t respect anything. He doesn’t respect the people who work for him. He doesn’t respect the office of the presidency. He doesn’t respect the racist idiots who support him. While his cult respects him, it’s OK if he doesn’t return it because they don’t respect themselves. Anyone with any self-respect, pride, dignity, ethics, morals, principles, or standards, would NEVER support the likes of a racist troglodyte moronic conman.

With over 148,000 deaths from the coronavirus, Donald Trump’s lack of respect for the life of American citizens has made it the Trump Virus. The other thing Donald Trump doesn’t respect is the Constitution of the United States of America.

Donald Trump doesn’t respect the military or those who serve in it. If he did, he would have confronted Vladimir Putin during a recent phone call about the report he put bounties on the lives of U.S. military members in Afghanistan. At the very least, he should have said something about it by now.

Donald Trump doesn’t respect America. He doesn’t respect the civil rights movement. He doesn’t respect John Lewis or what he stood for.

John Lewis was attacked by riot police in 1965. The government sicced the police goons on him and others fighting for civil rights. People who fight for civil rights fight for America. Today, Donald Trump, the President (sic) of the United States is sending unidentified armed goons to start riots and beat up protesters in America’s cities. It’s a disrespect to our citizens, civil rights, and the Constitution. It’s a huge dis to America.

The people protesting for black lives and racial justice today are the equivalent of the Freedom Riders of 1961. Donald Trump is the racist equivalent of Bull Connor, George Wallace, and Ross Barnett (who still has a lake named after him in Mississippi).

John Lewis is gone, but what he fought and stood for isn’t. As we fight for racial justice today, we need to keep alive the spirit of John Lewis, who never stopped fighting.

We all need to be more like John Lewis if we are to defeat those who aspire to be more like Donald Trump.

You can purchase a signed print of this cartoon.

New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.

Honestly, it’s not important whether a president throws out an opening pitch or not in Major League Baseball. It’s especially unimportant when that president (sic) is Donald Trump because there wouldn’t be anything meaningful about it other than his own ego boost.

The only thing significant about Donald Trump not throwing out an opening pitch is that he’s the first president (sic) not to do so since President Howard Taft started the tradition in 1910. Not only has every president since thrown out a first pitch, every one of them has done it on opening day except Jimmy Carter.

In what is hopefully his last year in office and last baseball season for him to do so, Donald Trump accepted an invitation to throw out the opening pitch in New York for the Yankees on August 15th. The reason Donald Trump probably accepted now is that there aren’t any fans in attendance because of the Trump Virus. He would be safe from being greeted by a chorus of boos in The Bronx. Donald Trump has probably set another record for being the most despised president (sic) in his  own hometown. New Yorkers do not like Donald Trump. Donald Trump says he could shoot a guy on 5th Avenue and not lose any supporters, which is ironic because he has very few supporters working and living on 5th Avenue.

Even though Donald Trump was guaranteed not to be booed by Yankee fans, I would have volunteered to draw frowny faces on each of the cardboard cutouts MLB has placed in the stands behind home plate.

Now, Donald Trump has backed out of throwing the opening pitch on August 15th. He says he’ll do it at a later date in the season, but who are we kidding? Just like one of those big announcements he promises, like on his new healthcare plan, or that time he promised to release his taxes, it’ll never happen.

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Of course, another thing he may be afraid of is every Yankee player taking a knee during the national anthem. Donald Trump tweeted last week, “Any time I witness a player kneeling during the National Anthem, a sign of great disrespect for our Country and our Flag, the game is over for me!” Every member of the Yankees, along with every member of the Nationals, took a knee during the anthem on opening day. The Bronx Bombers may make it a point to do so on Trump day, even if management orders them not to.

Of course, Donald Trump used an excuse to get out of throwing an opening pitch. His excuse? He’s too busy dealing with the coronavirus he’s ignored over the past six months, the economy he’s destroyed, and “much else.”

He sent a tweet Sunday about how busy he is. He’s so busy. I’m really hoping he can take a break every now and then because I’m concerned for his health (this is all sarcasm). He tweeted, “Because of my strong focus on the China Virus, including scheduled meetings on Vaccines, our economy and much else, I won’t be able to be in New York to throw out the opening pitch for the @Yankees on August 15th. We will make it later in the season!” When he said, “Much else,” he was referring to being a racist. Even that tweet was racist. 

But, just how busy is Donald Trump? He sent that tweet about his heavy workload on Sunday. Saturday, he was golfing with dick-pic aficionado Brett Favre who is also known for being a retired quarterback (that pic thing was a big deal for a minute). To cut Trump some slack, maybe he deserves a golf outing on Saturday because he hadn’t had one in five days. He was also golfing Sunday when he sent that tweet about how busy he was. He probably sent it from the golf course.

For the record, Donald Trump has had 266 golf outings according to the Presidential Golf Tracker (not an actual government source). According to shadowsockr安卓版设置, his outings at his own courses have cost taxpayers over $138 million. Donald Trump only golfs at his courses. That way, he gets to charge us for rooms and services at his resorts. We literally pay Donald Trump to golf. Say what you will about Obama’s golf outings, which were mostly on military courses, but we didn’t pay him for it.

If Donald Trump was really busy, he wouldn’t have time for golf. He wouldn’t have time for toilet tweeting. He wouldn’t start his workday at 1:00 P.M. as he usually starts each day with “executive time,” which is actually TV time. If Donald Trump was busy, he wouldn’t’ have time to call in to Fox & Friends to spread lies and scream about “much else.” If he was so busy, he wouldn’t have had time for all those ridiculous hate rallies he was having every week of his presidency until the pandemic shut them down. I watched a documentary on sloths last week and they have a heavier schedule than Donald Trump, plus they’re less racist.

Donald Trump is so not busy, he’s the only president who hasn’t shown any signs of aging while in office. It’s not because he has better DNA (HA!) or he doesn’t stress the workload. It’s because he’s not doing the job. The only thing Donald Trump stresses is not getting enough attention, credit, and losing in November which may send him to prison. Another reason he doesn’t show any signs of aging is that he spends two hours a day applying six cans of hairspray to his head and adding six pounds of makeup to his crater-pocked face. Also, he looked like crap on day one anyway. He just happens to look like the same piece of crap. Some would say it’s an art form.

With Donald Trump’s refusal to throw out an opening pitch, we’re going to miss his bragging about how awesome it was after he threw it into the dirt. We’re going to miss his cult praising the pitch and the human form he exhibited on the pitching mound. We’re going to miss watching him walked down the mound like it’s baby’s first steps on a wet ramp at the military academy. We may even be missing watching him pull a hammy. Damn.

We might be missing the sexiest political pitch since Chris Christie.

We don’t need Donald Trump to throw out an opening pitch. The only important aspect of this is the level of Trump bullshit. What I’ll be taking note of on August 15th is what Donald Trump actually does that day. It’ll probably be another day of over 100 tweets as it’ll be even closer to election day. Donald Trump will not be in a good mood between now and then.

The only pitches we’ll see from Donald Trump between now and election day will be racist comments. Donald Trump could have been the most racist guy to appear in Major League Baseball since Ty Cobb.

shadowsockr安卓版设置 Since I wrote this blog I was not surprised to learn the Yankees never even invited Trump. He just made it up.

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New Book: Tales From the Trumpster Fire

Watch me draw.